Woke up, feeling just alright today. However, my temperature rose just when I was about to leave home. Not because I was having a fever though. Auntie Lita approached me. Said Mummy ask me to give them money to buy lunch. They did not have money for dinner as well yesterday. Had no choice but to eat instant noodle. I myself have no money to spear already and you are there asking money from me!!! What the fuck you take me for??? For GRANTED!!! Where the hell have all your god damn money gone to??? I was so pissed, got dressed up and storm out of the house.
You are like that. HE is also like that!!! Out of anger, went to update my bankbook. Another $50 was withdrawn yesterday. At that moment, felt like screaming my head off already.
From 12 to 8pm, I was so damn busy. There was no time at all for other things except to create reservations and picking up telephone calls.
When I left the office, I called Dear. He did not pick up the phone. Messaged him as well. When I reached the bus-stop of my house, I began to dial his number again. Call was rejected. Had an incoming call from him instead. Complained to him how pissed I was this morning. Warn him not to do it to me as well. I do not want things to turn ugly between me and him. Really wonder how long much can I tolerate HER???
Also told him I may not get my upselling amount for the month of Septemerb at the end of this month. That means no extra money to depend on. God, SAVE ME!!! All because of the new assistant Financial Controller. So unflexible. Everything must go by the book. Without him signing our finalize list, we will not be able to get the money. Jackie is trying to push very hard for it now. ***Prays real hard***
Still on the phone with him when I was walking down the stairs. I almost died!!! Slipped from the top of the stair. Managed to grab hold on the hand-rail and lend my other hand against the wall. Landed my feet on the second step. Thank goodness. Wonder what will happen if i really fell. Back hit the stair, hurt my spine, become cripple, or maybe even die!!!
Now, am not in a very good mood again. Wonder where he had got to know this girl whom he have been emailing lately. At first, she just sent him her resume, to ask him to get her a job. Seeing the title, I thought it might be someone he knew. So I moved her email to his inbox instead of the junk mail. Then, they have been exchanging emails since then. Why made me upset was the mail I saw today. This was what it said:
Hi mama,
I'm ok n how r u? aiya mama no need thanks all coz it's my pleasure to reply ur mail.
So far no new plans, just normal routine but maybe next week there will b changes. Well d other doubts is bout urself. Quater u mentioned ready that u r open minded, understanding n frendly. So d balance........................, If u r willing to inform la.
Actually one of my fren working in singapore. To tell d truth, i don't prefer working in singapore coz i don't like d environment. It will just nice if i get job in malaysia. Anyway, all depend with my luck n GOD grace too.
Thanks mama, so far i don't feel want anything but if later i feel i'll ask it frm u. "JUST HAVE A SAVE JOURNEY" n that is my wish for u.
Ok till here only,
I like ur sentences bout d happiness............
TAKE CARE URSELF N CHILL OUT UR PRECIOUS TIME.
FRM,
GUNA
Who the hell is she??? Really want to find out. But if I does, then he will know that I am been checking on him. Implying that I do not trust him. How??? Really feel like I am lost in the jungle.
{&i'll hold on till the end of time-}
1:45 PM
I did a very daring thing last night. Pluck all the tail of my left eye-brow. Have not liked this side of my eye-brow at all. It is very scattered and shapeless. Not at all like the one on my right. So proud of my right eye-brow.
After so long, I got to have along talk with Dear again at night!!! The feeling is just so nice. Will be going shopping for his new clothes once our salary is out. 1st week of Novemeber I guess. Weekday or weekend? Still not decided. Scared to arrange on weekday as I have been very tied down with work for this past week. Scared that I am unable to leave the office so early. If we arrange on weekend, Dear might not like it. He hates going out on weekend, where there are many people everywhere and anywhere. We shall see...
It was such a nice feeling sitting at Adeline's place today. Simply love the feeling of the key board, the position, anything and everythign about it. Wonder will I get the chance to permanent sit there? ***Dreaming*** Got to sit at her place becauyse she was on MC today.
After lunch, went to see the doctor. Finally bear to bring myself to do so after one week. Well, all because Dear was start to nag at me already last night. I was diagnoised with food poisoning!!! Oh my!!! Was given medicine to stop the pain and diarhoea. Even had medicine for cramps. =) Came just in time. Have a feeling tomorrow will have bad cramps.
As usual, had a very busy time at work. Something happened... About one of the guest's reservation. There was a tiny bit that was my fault. I overlooked on the selling guideline for today at offered him the local promotional rate. However, nobody realised that. Because of this guest, Phoebe thought that it was my fault all the while. BUT I DID NOT COMMUNICATE WITH THE GUEST AT ALL EXCEPT FOR TODAY WHEN HE WAS STANDING RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOUR EYES!!! The reservations was arranged and agreed between me and one of the consultant working at the Club. She came to the office, shouted at me and left. I was stunned. Before I could say anything, she had stomped out already. Called me again. Mumbled at me and slam down my phone. CAN YOU GET YOUR FACTS RIGHT BEFORE YOU START SCREAMING AND SHOUTING AT PEOPLE!!! BITCH!!! Was at the verge of screaming back at her already. Imagine if I really did that. Will really shock everyone present. But I thought, we will meet everyday. Do not want to make things difficult. However, all my other colleagues was not satisfied. When Jackie talk to her, when Justin came in, all of them defended me. =) So touched. Now I know what I mean to them. =) Thank you very much my girls!!! Just cannot stand the attitude of Phoebe. Cannot swallow down what she did to me. SHALL NOT FORGIVE HER!!! I AM NOT A FORGIVING PERSON TO START WITH!!! STEP ON ME AND YOU SHALL SEE!!! Sounds vicious??? =) Just feel like continue ranting on it but it is useless. Shall not waste my time and energy on a BITCH.
Just before 8pm, a Cathay Pacific staff bought Hagean Daz (Correct spelling?) ice-cream for the Receptionists, I think. But they brought it to our office and shared with us as well. =) At that time, I was having a bad gastric pain. Seems like my stomach is giving me lots of problems now. Was advised by the doctor not to take things with milk. But I still ate the ice-cream. =) Asked Darlene if she wanted to go for dinner. Suggested to go and eat at Ang Mo Kio. 1st thing that came to my mind was the western food Ryan has been talking about. She too wanted to go there and eat because of that. =) But overall, not that fantastic to me.
Now, I am worried about something. Financial problem!!! Left with some $50 for the next 2 weeks. How am I to survive!!! Gave my OCBC card to Dear already. Am actually trying to stop myself from using my upselling money and saving it for rainy day. But it seems like he is using it happily. Wonder how can I voice it out to him to STOP USING THAT MONEY!!! Feel hurt when he use it but I also cannot stop him right? This is just so him. Do not plan for the future. I thought I was worse. It was not true anymore after getting to know him.
Dear is so sweet. He is going to find out how to do so that I am able to get the Samsung E600C. But I know we shall have to use OUR savings to buy it. Should I really go ahead and buy it?
{&i'll hold on till the end of time-}
2:07 PM
I thought I could get my hands on Samsung E600C today. Even brought my handphone charger out.
After so long, I was alone for the 1st hour of work. Enjoyed it so much.
I was very busy at work today. After lunch, went to try the new uniform. YES!!! It is ready to be worn tomorrow. Shall I change tomorrow??? I decided to bring home this new set of uniform home weekly to wash. Shall not leave it there anymore. To prevent it from looking old, to prevent it from being stolen. And guess what??? My skirt is actually far too big than what it was suppose to be. The measurement was taken in August. If I am not wrong. And now, it is actually quite loose!!! What does this shows? My trips to gym has been effective!!! Am thinking if I should go again tomorrow. No I do not think so. Not in the mood to go anymore. Shall just depend on what I am eating now. As for meals, to eat LESS!!!
Dear called me at around 4.30pm. Asked if I am ready to leave for work. Suppose to go Sembawang to buy the handphone then. But I was still tied down with work. Only left at 6.30pm. Called him then. Thought of just meeting me at Toa Payoh. Just as what i was thinking of as well just now. =) Asked me to go and ask those M1 shops around City hall to see if they have the same price offered. Just as I guessed, their price were much higher. Thought of going to Toa Payoh to check the price. But was too lazy and tired to do so. Head for home instead. Learnt afew things from my trip to the shops today.
- I can only upgrade my plan if I had completed at leat 18 months of my contract.
- The same goes if I want to apply for another line.
- We can cancel one existing line and apply for a new line using the old number. But this can only be done at those M1 shops.
- $200 deposit must be given for work permit holders but not for permanent residents or employment pass holders.
When I got home, just rested on the sofa to watch television. But food in my kitchen was calling me over. Ate alot alot alot. Am so full now!!! Stomach feel and look so big. Quite sometime since I have ate this much already. Really regret. Could it be a sign of PMS? Stress? Or just plain greedy? Well, shall stop it from now. Otherwise, what I have been doing to become slim and maintain the figure will go down the drain.
{&i'll hold on till the end of time-}
12:49 PM
Alarm rang at 6.30am. Woke up, off the alarm and went back to sleep!!! By the time I woke up, it was 6.45am!!! That was suppose to be the time I leave home. Left the house 10 minutes later than usual.
I think I was able to reach hotel on time. However, at Braddell and Dhoby Gauht MRT station, the doors refused to open. Wasted quite a while in both stations.
When I reached hotel, it was just after 8am. To my suprised, Rebecca has arrived already. To think my first time being late is being seen by someone. She did not mention anything though. Instead, she asked me to help her do her homework. I felt obliged to help then. After clearing most of my work, I did her assignment. Took me about an hour to do it. In the meantime, she helped me to clear abit of the faxes as well. =)
Just when I finished her assignment, things begin to be chaotic in the office. There was not much faxes to clear through-out the day. However, calls keep coming in non-stop. The same goes for emails.
Dear called me as well. He went for interview at Ritz Carlton!!! =) All seems well. Was asked to call them to arrange for a 2nd interview, to meet the Front Office Manager. But he has yet to do so. Wonder when will he do so. Shall not pressurize him further to find another job. Anyway, he is the Acting Night Manager already. So once his probation is up, he will receive the confirmation letter. With this letter, he is able to get the same position with a better pay (of course) else where.
Just when I was about to go for lunch, I had just completed creating the reservations I took by phone. Still had faxes and some 23 emails to clear!!! Asked Rebecca, Darlene and Siti to go ahead 1st. By the time I settled down, it was quite late already. Did not feel like going for lunch at all. However, was asked to go by Jackie and Ein Ein. Joined them for lunch then.
At 4pm, another bunch of emails came. Cleared all of them before proceeding to do other stuff. As I cleared one, another one came. Pissed!!! Took me quite a while to clear them. Then, I quickly clear the faxes, and reservaitons I had on hand. I had to leave by 5pm. Meeting Dear then. Managed to clear my work and leave then.
Wanted to wacth Residence Evil at 1st. But it was too late already. Dear even suggested going to Orchard!!! Unbelievable!!! But we did not in the end. I know he is too tired to go watch a movie. Was pissed off in the beginning when we met. Had called Elaine earlier to ask her help me check for movie show time. However, she did not pick up the call. She was outside watching Residence Evil then. Thought she wili be at home studying... She messaged me later on, asking me why I called. However, Dear took the phone form me and started to message her. Shall not mention what is in the messages. I did upset me though. What the hell is he tryng to do??? But all is well again after awhile. Well, we always have to give and take right?
Took a slow walk, with occassionally rest till we reached Raffles City. Decided to go for dinner at the food court. Thumbs up for the pasta they serve there. It was a very large portion and very DELICIOUS!!! Should try it one day if you can...
Went home after that. Before going home, Dear helped me to go check out the price of buying the Samsung E6000C. Result: Trade in my phone, sign new line, top up $48 and I will get it. But, I have to first check if I can request for the new number to be Dear's number. If possible, he will cut off his line and get the new one. Shall do it if I have the time tomorrow.
Dear and I have decide on something. To go study accounting together. Should be able to do so at the beginning onf next year. We shall see how things goes.
{&i'll hold on till the end of time-}
12:52 PM
I was asleep already at 11pm. Thinking, later when you call, I will be more awake to talk to you. How wrong can I be. Was awoken by the sharp pain in my stomach AGAIN!!! Have a feeling of fear in me now. Headed to the toilet straight. When I returned, the 1st thing I did was to check my handphone. Did I miss any call or messages, in particular, yours??? I was so wrong... so naive as well...
Before I cry muself to sleep again, I had better let it off here. It helps. I think...
It has been 4 days... since you last called me. On Friday and Saturday, I called to wake you up. Chatted for a while and told me you will call me back again. But you never did. Not even a message, telling me you are busy. This is what you been doing previously, if you ever remembered what you have done then. Stopped myself from calling you yesterday. A test to see if you would call. You never did as well. Stayed up to wait. My phone was in total silence for the whole night. Messaged you and you say you are busy. FINE!
Your promise to me this morning??? To see if you can not work tomorrow night. As usual, called to wake you up. Messaged you late at night to ask you about it and you totally FORGOT???
I feel like I am such a fool now. Even the computer is making fun of me. Have to restart... cannot sign in to MSN... keep having those silly pop-ups...
Yes, you called me then. But is that your voice? It suddenly sound like a stranger's... Keep using busy as an excuse. Or maybe it is true. You can choose to totally not talk to me. It is fine. Is it really fine???
Is your work really that important to you now? I do not deny, yes it is the time where you are building up your career now. But can you please have the courtesy to at least inform the idiot who is waiting for your call that you are busy and ask her to go and rest 1st??? You are able to sleep your way out in the day. When she is at work. But what about her??? When you call her in the middle of the night, she have to be awake to entertain you. To bear with your hot and cold attitude towards her.
In just 3 words: YOU HAVE CHANGED!!! You may say that I am sensitive. Yes I am. If I am not, how else can I sensed that you changed???
{&i'll hold on till the end of time-}
6:29 AM
Yesterday was just spent at home idling my time away. Woke up rather early. Was actually awoken by the screeching of car. Heard from my mother that an old lady is being knocked down by a car. Wonder what has happened. The way she crossed the road is exactly how I would cross to get to the bus-stop opposite my house. Scary... Will I change to using the traffic light to cross the roads from now onwards? No. I do not think so. Just plain laziness.
Another reason why I woke up is because of the growl from my stomach. Hungry... Ate a waffle. Saw it lying on the table then. Asked around whose was it and noone responded me. I then happily ate the whole thing. =)
Not long after, I fall asleep!!! Woke up around an hour or so later. Heard that my maid cooked porridge. Had a plate of it as well. As I am eating, I was watching ... ... TAMIL SHOW!!! Yes you did not see anything wrong. There was nothing interesting on television. That show was the most entertaining one to me. Hence, ... It is also high time I get use to it. So that I can accompany Dear watch it next time. Who knows I will also be able to understand abit of tamil in future. =)
Spend the afternoon on-line, talking to Elaine. She was so sweet. Asked me to join her for dinner with her family. However, there was dinner for me already at home. We shall go for dinner next time, after your exams? Had quite a lot for dinner. It has been a long time since I ate at home. Suddenly, the food Auntie Lita cooked taste so delicious. It was also the first time I heard cooking pork chop using biscuits crumbs instead of the normal bread crumbs. The biscuits used is the sqaure shape Khong Guan brand type of biscuit. DELICIOUS!!! You should try it as well.
At night, while on-line, had the urge to eat chocolate. However, there is none at home. Was lazy to go to the 7-11 downstairs to buy as well. My mouth just crave to eat something. Ended up eating 3 ice-cream cones with maple syrup and 1/2 a packet of peanuts. GREDDY!!!
Today was another day where I ate alot. Messaged Dear before I left home. Asked him if he will accompany watch Residence Evil this week. Then, went to 7-11 to buy my daily dosage of Hello Panda strawberry biscuit with a packet of Milo. However, they did not have the biscuit. 2nd alternative, Char siew bread.
Dear called me when I am on the bus, on the way to work. He has On-the-Job Training tomorrow. If he is able to not go to work again tomorrow night, he will go watch the movie with me then. ***Prays hard Mr Eusoff will let him off tomorrow night*** Poor Dear. Work today till 7am, then training from 9am to 5pm tomorrow. If he has to work again at night, he practically do not have any time to rest at all!!! Even if he does not want to watch it tomorrow, it is fine. I know you will be very tired my Dear. We can still watch it during the weekends, right? =)
Am so pissed of with Justin now. Being a Reception Manager when he does not know a thing??? Why I take in LHW reservations when I know we do not have anymore deluxe rooms??? Hey!!! LHW reservations cannot be rejected!!! IT is a confirmed reservations. You have been here for so long and you do not know??? Fancy you being a Reception Manager.
Another thing that pissed me off is his heck-care attitude. Shall not eleborate further. If not I will never be able to end this blog.
During lunch, had fish porridge, followed by a bowl of tau suan.
After work, on my way home, felt hungry again. Ate my Hello Panda as well as Pokky strawberry biscuits.
After bring Annice down, could not resist but ate a small bowl of rice with soup again!!!
Guess it is because IT is coming again. Quite scared of IT already nowadays. Seems like I will get bad cramps already very month. Shall go get some medicines to stand-by 1st.
Besides that, have been having bad stomachaches quite often. Can say everytime after I finish my meal. Wonder why. It begins after my dinner at Breeks. Shall I go see the doctor???
Have 2 thoughts in my mind now.
- Take up part time up studies, major in accounting
- Give tution to Primary school student
Should I or should I not. Shal discuss it further later...
{&i'll hold on till the end of time-}
10:40 AM
Jackie messaged me the same time my alarm rang. 6.30am. So coincident. She wants to claim an hour.
Seems like nowadays, I can get dressed up in 10 minutes time. Idle my 5 minutes away before steeping out of my house. Just do not feel like going to work earlier already nowadays.
Headed home straight after work today. Just when I was about to leave the carpark, saw someone familiar walking in my opposite direction. With a closer look, it was David!!! Did not know how to react then. Wanted to have a casual chat with him. However, when we were just opposite each other, we just gave each other a smile. No voice could come out from me. Just smile, look away and went up the escalator. Why??? Make me look so unfriendly. I really did not mean it.
Took a nap immediately after I got home. Woke up around 2 hours later. Guess I will not be sleeping early tonight. Can get to talk to Dear more I guess tonight. Have not been talking much to him on the phone recently. Whenever he call at night, I will already be asleep. Cannot really concentrate on talking further.
Went down for dinner then. Saw Daddy there while I was eating. However, he did not see me. To call or not to call him??? Decided to continue eating and pretend that I did not see him. So bad of me...
There was no interesting show on the television tonight. Force myself to watch America Funniest Home Video with Michelle. Had a good laugh with her over anything and everything. It has been such a long time that we get to spend time alone and so stupid things together. I have really been neglecting my family alot recently. I just cannot help it. Too busy with work and Dear. I better know how to appreciate things that I have now before it is too late. Then, it is also too late for regrets.
Called Dear to wake him up at 8.30pm. He had actually woke up already. Asked him if he is really going to Malaysia this week. I thought of watching Residence Evil with him next weekend. After that, we can go for dinner at Newton Circus? Can get to eat whatever seafood he wants. We shall see how then. Shall discuss with him further later if I have the chance to.
Today is the first time I watch Singapore Idol. Quite a funny show. Quite nice as well. What a waste. I did not bother to catch the previous episodes. Shall see if I can get the chance to watch the future episodes.
Now, I am just waiting for Dear to call...
{&i'll hold on till the end of time-}
12:57 PM
